Sometimes I feel helpless. Like I’m in a fuckin time loop. On some prisoner shit. There’s certain aspects of me that aren’t there to benefit me and it gets hard to deal with. Sometimes I just don’t know what to do about it.
I hate that shit. I really love everyone. Genuinely. But sometimes I can’t find that same love for myself. Sometimes I wish my dad never got sick so he could’ve had the chance to give me some tough love. I wish he beat my ass a few times so I wouldn’t have ended up like this. I feel like, since birth, I’ve evaded discipline in almost every way, shape, and form. And it’s starting to take a toll on my life and how I’m navigating through young adulthood.
Sometimes I wish I could do more for my mom yo.
I hate seeing her work. She lost her husband and had to take care of him for 10 years until his body finally gave up. That shit’s sick yo. I know me, Memie, and Buta is all she has left and that’s why I been tryna quit the drugs. This shit get hard bro. I can’t let anything happen to me for my family’s sake. I love them so much. Sometimes I just wanna cry (lol), but I got shit to do and shit to prove. The fans, my family, and this music shit be the only things that kinda keep me happy. If I ain’t have this shit I don’t know what the fuck I’d be on.
